Still, back to basics.
she says,
angie lim.
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Monday, March 31, 2008, 7:33 PM
What day is it? And in what month?This clock never seemed so alive
I can't keep up and I can't back down
I've been losing so much time
Cause it's you and me and all of the people with nothing to do
Nothing to lose
And it's you and me and all of the people
And I don't know why, I can't keep my eyes off of you
All of the things that I want to say just aren't coming out right
I'm tripping on words
You've got my head spinning
I don't know where to go from here
Listening to Lifehouse, You and Me.
Had good long talks with some friends these days; they taught me perspectives I've never thought of before.
And also, how to keep away from long silences over the phone. Say Boo!
Sunday, March 30, 2008, 11:14 AM
Yesterday was an eventful day.Sports Carnival (: Fun ,but no sun tan. Played modified touch rugby, and frisbee. Didnt win alot but I certainly saw the funloving side of my class. Its amazing how girls can yell and scream so much. Met up with Mervis, Ren Kai and Lester, as well as Mr Tonny Lim and Mr Seq.
Lunched at Newton, and basically just talked. Brought up some of my nagging worries and thoughts to them, and I'm glad I did so.
Everything's becoming far too uncertain and almost out of my reach. Have I really been so out of touch? I cant seem to go beyond an invisible wall which I'm desperately trying to break down. More often than not I know that I'm subconsciously building up these walls to shut myself out from everything else, but I also know that some people around me are also doing the same.
Why?
People change, people go, plans shift. But it stifles me to know that I cant bring it all back anymore, and that some things have happened but I cannot and I dont know how to pick up the pieces.
Absence, or simply getting too silent?
I'm feel like I'm at a dead end.
Friday, March 28, 2008, 3:03 PM
I had a good time today at the movies; havent laughed this much in a long long while now, except yesterday (Pitstop, that is). So, thank you.For the third time in all 18 years of my life, I entered the gents again. At City Hall somemore! Goodness. But wasnt just me, cos the next 2 girls who came in after me also went the gents first LOL. Not my bad! It's that pathetic small not-very-eye-catching label on the doors that I missed.
Oh well.
I've tutorials waiting ever so patiently for me on the desk; so TATA world. Till the next time (which I predict will be Sunday), bye.
Thursday, March 27, 2008, 7:27 PM
Just! Reached home from Pitstop; its really nice there, though a little ex but worth every cent I guess. Thanks to those who came today (:Oh oh oh, I passed my Chem Block test too! I'm very sure of the exact grade yet, but! Its definitely NOT a subpass or ungraded. For once! Thank god for that.
I'm a happy girl today I guess (: So lucky!
Sunshine and love be with you
In rainy days I shall be with you
Love is no fool
Dreams come true
- Ah Wang's adventures, a drama serial now on ch 8. I like it, alot.
Wednesday, March 26, 2008, 8:16 PM
Random: I feel like a wreck in the head now cos I sort of mishandled an outing LOL. Luckily its settled already. 5:07 PM
Every time I see you fallingI get down on my knees and pray
I'm waiting for the final moment
You say the words that I can't say
Seeing my sister getting upset over the Chem MCQ results (which is already posted on Litespeed for all to see) I couldnt help but see a part of me in her. It wasnt very long ago when I felt the same way, if not even more than now, about being academically poor. And its taken me onto a whole new level where things become so crystal clear.
And I've not forgotten what Ms Chiew said to me just a few months ago.
Today, its pouring rain again. Its silly now that I think back about all that I've been; childish, naive, blind and foolish. In the past I used to wish that I could grow up faster, just so I can be 'mature'. Now I realise... I dont want to grow up just yet. Because growing up means responsibilities, and promises? Because I tend to be careless and ignorant? I think I know why. Its because I need assurance. How silly of me (:
Please forgive me if I'm being careless with your emotions. I am not God you know. I cant predict. But I want to be able to listen, and be heard.
Monday, March 24, 2008, 11:19 PM
I hate myself for taking things for granted. I guess it is human nature that we sometimes, just sometimes, take things for granted.Saturday, March 22, 2008, 9:26 PM
Re-reading gmails is like wow.That journey has been so amazing, is all I can say. And no, not emo-ing or anything. But listening to The Extra Mile plus gmail is ((: Just great.
Recently, everything's been a tad too quiet. Silence, or simply absence?
Friday, March 21, 2008, 4:31 PM
This is the second time I'm packing my tables again, in three months. I have a never-ending pile of notes and books all stacked up on the table, and I sure hope I can get rid of them quickly. That's like at least 8 months later!Well. I shant complain yet.
Last night my grandma came over and stayed the night. She taught me and my sisters how to cook my fave pig stomach soup (directly translated from the chi name for it)! And her soup is no ordinary soup okay, its fantastic.
I think she's an amazing woman (:
And I'm sorry to Von and 29th for not going dinner as she and they presumed I would; I really wanted to go too but my GRANDMA was coming.
Tuesday, March 18, 2008, 2:16 PM
Blocks fever ~highness.Down to Chem and Physics (: I'm pleased with that. But not so much for GP Econs and Math.
Took me more than half an hour just to choose and plan for the GP essay qn - and honestly I feel that essay isnt well done at all. We'll see when it comes back after marking!
And believe it or not, being a first-timer at the H2 Econs exams I actually attempted the 25 mark essay LOL. Never die before. It'll be a miracle if I even pass that one! Btw I suffered a terrible cramp after rushing those essays; now I finally understand how it truly feels to be an H2 Econs student (:
Math is - KILLER. Shant elaborate too much; its demoralising. Perhaps I should be happy that I could do more questions (correctly, I hope) this time round (:
Psst. Never eat too much during lunch and before an exam. Makes you so sleepy can. Zzzz. But! I had a good and happy lunch with Von and Lester, so it doesnt matter.
Before I disappear back into the notes, I'd like to say thankyous to the people who called and smsed etc (: Xiexie you! Perhaps when the results come and they're good, we can go out and celebrate! Hahaa.
Hey, it pays to be optimistic okay!
Friday, March 14, 2008, 8:34 PM
The sun was out today (: Its a good weather to be. Had a very productive study today with Ms Seah and class; guess I still need lots and lots of practice to remember everything taught today!I have lots of thoughts in my head, but I dont know where to start. As usual (:
I am happy, but I am not. I am tired. Really, really tired.
Tuesday, March 11, 2008, 9:04 PM
Rained all day! Even though the sun was shining so nicely. Hmph.
Random: I want an mp3. Yells: An emmpeeethweee! What for? To store all the music and blah. Oh well.
Had a conducive study today at the canteen with Abel Mervis and my sister; thanks for your help Mervis (:
P.S. I feel so random today.
Monday, March 10, 2008, 7:37 PM
Had a gooood talk with Ms MakXueWei today; we set out wanting to do some revision for market structures but again, us being us, we spent more time talking instead. Nonetheless it was great, thankyou Ms Mak. Enjoy your trip to HCMC okay!Its been raining all day long today, makes the sky look so gloomy.
Less than one week to Blocks; prep work for it so far is okay, though a little sluggish. Hopefully I wont get tired of Econs and Chem just yet!
Saturday, March 8, 2008, 9:28 PM
My mind's a blank. A big empty space stretched way beyond my imagination. Uh oh, there's still such a long way to go, Angie.Are you ready!
Am I? Ahhhh.
Thursday, March 6, 2008, 11:24 PM
Life is amazing, especially when you least expect it to be. Today was one such day.Tuesday, March 4, 2008, 7:42 PM
Econs, Maths and GP tests - passed! Yayness. Lets hope this good luck wears on till As or something, LOL.Seeing them at Level Camp this year, forging stronger friendships and gaining new insights in their own lives and all.. Makes me wish I were there too. It isnt everyday that the opportunity presents itself to learn from and teach others; I believe the camp will be a blast.
Pass it on, pass it on!
Sometimes I want to reach out but I cant feel anything there. Its times like these when I tell myself its okay, its okay, move on. For the longest time since I last cried, I allowed myself to cry on the way home.
Monday, March 3, 2008, 7:49 PM
Out of random thoughts to relive those touching moments again, I caught snippets of Edward Scissorhand on Youtube. Almost all at once I felt the urge to smile and cry at the same time. This is my all-time favourite.
Loving, yet not able to hold or touch the loved ones.
Saturday, March 1, 2008, 7:58 PM
I think this is beautiful, and so true.To realise the value of one year,
ask a student who failed his or her exams.
To realise the value of one month,
ask a mother who gave birth to a premature baby.
To realise the value of one week,
ask an editor of a weekly magazine.
To realise the value of one day,
ask a daily wage labourer who has six kids to feed.
To realise the value of one hour,
ask the lovers who are waiting to meet.
To realise the value of one minute,
ask a person who missed their train.
To realise the value of one second,
ask the person who survived an accident.
To realise the value of one millisecond,
ask the athlete who won the silver medal in the Olympics.
Today, everyday, I make a new discovery about myself, about others, about the world around me. I cant believe that I had been so blind until I learnt to remove my tinted glasses to see.
"Falling from grace, and then taking baby steps to recovery."