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Thursday, April 27, 2006, 3:01 PM
pictures from saturday's dragonboat funrace :] we sho enjoyed ourselves yep. singing "rowrow your boat" and laughing fer no reason.. these are part o the fun! right tricia? :] grins. we had gone to esplanade for dinner as well; my god we blew the tops off our heads with lame jokes and hilarious things... thanks to the 5 o them who bought food fer us to share around :] muacks. they were yummy!
to put it simply.
0621 rockks :]
meanwhile everyone must buck up for the week's tests aiight?!
1:50 PM
it seems that my life is turning into one crazy cloud of confusion, and i am stumbling around blindly, hoping to find some sort of direction. there are moments when i feel so exasperated with the human race as a whole, simply because i cannot seem to please anyone! this life really sucks. big time. can someone, anyone, just give me a good reason why i should continue this way! i think i'm missing something but i cannot find what exactly it is. it seems so near yet so far.. so intangible. "sometimes i know the words to say,
give thanks for all that you've done,
but then they fly up and away,
as quickly as they come."
i think i'm feeling a tad happier these days, simply cos i am no longer hiding behind any masks; i am being the same plain old me again; school, study, eat, council stuffs, sleep. and the cycle repeats itself so i've got no time left for other matters. though i still think back and choke back on a tear or two cos of those times.. for now, no more trying so hard when the other end isnt receiving the line.. right? but i still want to sit on the swings and wonder about it all; did it all even happen? maybe, maybe not. will there ever be a future for us? i dont know. but lets just leave things as they are. cos i think we're all happier this way :] are we? hmmm.. we are all fighting a losing battle against time; distance probably sets us apart too.
"who paints the world a rainbow,
when it's filled with broken dreams,
who explains it so clearly,
when nothing's what it seems..."
- can the old man with a white beard up there hear me calling?
Monday, April 24, 2006, 9:38 AM
Superduperwoopylooperelliooper longgg entrée for now. Here goes!Saturday:
AJ family day! I crashed [ as usual ] and saw everyone I haven’t seen in eons! Thanks to meiying huizhen and sihui for the coupons heh :] as well fer jes meiying and huizhen’s company! and these ppl I saw! [ odac ] alan hazel cheeyong myra Vanessa xi’er clement Kelvin teckhow Jocelyn meiying jon pang wynee marcus Anthony. Plus! Jeslynn Jaclyn aga kim zoe huizhen ruoyi sihui lindy marilyn grace matthew zhenlong jieying jancy jinken ben ms chan [ gp! ] etc… oh I felt so homely! Returning to aj is a recollection of all the times spent in the first 3 mths as part of 04/06 [then] ; so many places and the wacky things we did! I missed them all. I miss the ij girls, 4/2, 04/06..
Ij! I miss the Thomson site where we trudged up the slope every morning w/o fail; I miss the hymns; I miss the blue pinafore; I miss the creaky chair of mine; I miss Bernie kor’s lamity and her red-hot specs; I miss her vandalizing my palm-and-laptops with all assortment of markers pens to highlighters; I miss meiying’s singing of Chinese songs to keep me awake in class; I miss ditzy aileen and auntie melia’s laughter and chair-kicking; I miss class outings to sentosa and all; I miss my chess juniors; I miss the math night study classes; I miss the days! 04/06! I miss all the simple but interesting entertainment; I missed bball during pe; I miss the jokes we shared and burst out laughing so much at; I miss our regular ij table; I miss the outings to pool and nyp; I miss 04/06! Will we still remember this class? Pls say yes! I miss odac; I miss the challenges and games and sweat and teamwork; I miss rock-climbing and bouldering and abseiling; I miss the j2s funny comments and their friendliness; I miss the crappiness and photo-takings; oh how I miss aj so!!
I took a walk down memory lane today…it hurts to be part of the shadows now.
today:
ny dragonboat funrace! 0621’s ‘spiderboy and his amazing friends’ rocked the ass outta everyone haha. We had fun didn’t we?! Thanks for all the hard work put in guys! Rowers who rowed and shouters who, uh, shouted! Haha :] what an experience :]
Oh boy the elections results are out! Woot* yay I can finally heave a HUGE sigh o relief now. Like, finally! After putting in much efforts and all. Just hope that everything goes well from now, though I really REALLY doubt so. what contradictory thoughts. Oh well. Guess I gathered enough goodlucks to pull me thru this time. Heheh. :] congrats to germaine and mitzi and all other elects too. Coincidence huh? Mrs selvam’s 3 chem reps are all in ny council as elects haha. I’m a happy girl again!
Lol the ny trad dance song is lingering in my head! “ and I’m gonna be the very best I can, to be your lover cos I understand!” oh lets dance! Wont you dance with me? Boy I’m getting carried away..
Tata!
Saturday, April 22, 2006, 12:33 PM
hey.random post here..
i've got to say this. if you ever want to say something, anything, i just wanna letcha knoe that i can offer a listening ear. i cannot do anything but please understand that we all care just as much and as they say, god opens a door when he closes a window. that day will come when the dammed river bursts and floods.. then let it flow. thats all i can say.
ok?
meanwhile we all need some breathing space i guess.
12:06 PM
pe was a challenge today; we ran our 2.4km and I felt like I was dying because I hadnt run for some time now! Urgh. Managed to clock in 14.31; not bad for starters. Funny thing was, when I was on my fourth round or so, I had been so worn out I kept my eyes on the ground, trying to psycho myself into running some more, and outta the corner o my eye I spotted someone about to overtake me. That someone ran so lightly and had legs that looked like they belonged to a girl.. or so I thought. lo and behold it was aaron! [ gasps ] I burst out laughing after that. And yes aaron I know you’re rolling your eyes at this…Went to kovan with 0621ians for pizza hut lunch after school! Woohoo* I think we ate more cheese than pizza. Right simon and jibin? Lol say cheese everyone! shuheng was so funny he sent jibin and tricia into giggles that soon became stifled laughter; what exactly did he do? I dont know; just looking at his face probably made them laugh all the more! Jibin took a whole 5 minutes to chew her one mouthful o pizza and swallow it haha. Laughter kept her full. :] right? But anw we all enjoyed ourselves. We began exchanging ezlink cards to see the photos taken in secondary school… lol everyone looked so different then! All the baby fats and chubbiness gone; to become who they are today! We had a good laugh and I really needed that :] bowling! Hadn’t done that in eons now. I still bowl as badly as ever wahaha! My palms were so sweaty the bright orange 8-pound ball slipped off and flew backwards once… my gawd it was embarrassing. Shant elaborate la huh! Jun an, pretend you didnt see anything! [ grins ] Then everyone started crowding around the photohunt machine; so fun! But no space leh.. I stood outside to peep thru the glass window and rapped it so many times to give the answer I felt like I was miming! But that machine was quite fun to fiddle with. We even hit top scores! Nyjc 0621 rockks :]
Thank you guys fer so much fun today* lets play some more when we can aiight! Meanwhile lets do our best for this Sunday’s dragonboat funrace :]
Thursday, April 20, 2006, 3:39 PM
i feel bummed out. the Q&A with the j2s left me thinking. so much.how the council and the school population should really work together, or else so many misunderstandings crop up; it aint easy. talk is cheap. really cheap.
side note to someone out there. some time ago, I felt I had seen the flicker of light in the midst of enormous negativity in you and I wanted to try to fan that flame. along the way i faltered.. but it doesnt mean i've stopped trying. give me a chance again..
if theres one thing i really want to do right now, i just want to go to the park and sit on the swings; to feel happy again.
Wednesday, April 19, 2006, 11:40 AM
had Q&A session with j1s in the hall today; what an experience. sweaty palms, numb feet and butterflies in my stomach were all that accompanied me throughout the half an hour. theres more to expect from thursday's session with the j2s.. oh boy. mom i'm telling you i'll be that mad-head chicken you dreamt of last night. soon. cook me some more of your soup please! :]am having mixed emotions these days. shant elaborate much. its a fluctuating thing and goes to the extremes; its hard to put it in words. like everything's gone from haywire to splat! a gooey mess.
"part of me laughs
part of me cries
part of me wants to question why
why is there joy
why is there pain
why is there sunshine after rain.."
i'm wearing a doublefaced mask. now you see me, now you dont.
i dont want to know the ugly truth; what if its true? are we still the way we are now? have we changed? why? what will happen tomorrow?have we become so distant we dont talk anymore..
Monday, April 17, 2006, 3:36 PM
yay 0621 has a class blog! woo hoo :] ok i feel so much better now so pls just ignore the previous crappy post; i think i was pms-ing a lil.
here's a tribute to everyone: to 0621, for remembering my bday! yay:] i lurve the bear and earrings> to denise! for your big house and present :] to jes! for giving me the greatest hug :] to marilyn! for the heart pendant; so sweet! to cuthbert! for the wrinkly-but-adorable pug. and theres so many more.. my juniors for their wishes and smses.
and here's my new phone no: _____ haha ook get it from my msn nick :] see ya all. tata
7:10 AM
Sometimes I really wonder if I’ve done the right thing in the first place. I didn’t mean to be the odd one out. I seemed so out of place; like I’ve been wrong all these while. I don’t know why but I’m angry. I’m upset. I… I feel sore. Sore and wanting to cry it out. I cant. A trillion arrows point at me as I avoid them like a pigeon in the shooting gallery, ducking the attacks; a trillion signs that tell me I should just let go.. Because, because… it just isn’t right to cling onto that strand of hope that doesn’t belong to me in the first place! Inside of me I feel sore and angsty. So teach me how to let it go… at least I will feel better; I hope. Teach me how to keep my distance; to keep out the lingering thoughts and stay the way I used to be..Friday, April 14, 2006, 7:04 AM
Hello hello! I decided to revamp a lil after all :] have got lots to update on, cos I haven’t been doing so [ I know I know I shoulda been nicer to this darling blog ] and theres been aplenty of stuffs to say > ny’s really great cos I’m enjoying my everyday here [ except for tutorials. Rahh. I’m always like doing last min touches to my work so I get pretty hurried and flustered. Like always. ] haha so much for trying to juggle time b/w work and campaigning for council! Its like, rush home, bathe, stone, eat, make posters, stone some more, and homework, then make more posters, sleep. The whole cycle ends at midnight cos that’s when I lose track of what I write. It’s a big risk to take when I’m working on tutorials involving essay writings; econs essays can churn out random statements from tv to pillows to Pringles “ road pricing is an efficient way of reducing stress when the body needs 6 to 7 hrs of sleep ’’, “demand outweighs supply for [ Pringles ] vegetable oil, monosodium glutamate, salt..’’ and [ in minjun’s case ] spaghetti and netball comes into play too. Oh funny things we write! I gotta work hard haha. I’m trying so guess I need some time to really get the feel of council [ if I ever get in! ] and jc life. Oh boy give me some good advice to be a survivor! And I have turned seventeen too :] 11 april rules! Yay haha. seemed just like yesterday.. it’s been great this year; so much more than I’d expected! Especially from 0621 :] who sang birthday song during break and for the present! From Aaron, Minjun, jibin, and more; thankew! I lurve it. Bright and funky earrings cheer me up. and the loved ones around me who didn’t forget! Oh sweet Bernie kor, Jesmine, meiying, Jaclyn, Joanna friends family and fellow ny council nominees who wished me too!! The wonderful hugs and pats are a source of motivation for me :] these are bound to be etched in my heart always!
One more thing. I’ve gotta train for fitness test asap! I’m getting so so unfit, which drags me down in the hopes of getting at least silver [ as always ] hmph must train! Hmmm sometimes I wonder if self-psychology even works on me?! Think it doesn’t haha.
Friday, April 7, 2006, 10:07 AM
been so busy these days; and it sho didnt help when my phone was stolen. rahh. what a big april fools' joke huh. sigh. guess i'm getting used without my phone now; its becoming much less of a hassle to keep minding it and sensing its constant presence around me. these days i've been boggled down by lil pieces of information that pop up in the middle o nowhere and linger around until its enough to drive me to slumberland when my eyelids begin to close ever so slowly. its pretty much due to lectures when i can no longer stifle my yawns and the tempting urge to stop my brain from functioning properly. oh boy. then theres students council; surprisingly i passed the 1st interview to start campaigning. i wonder how i should start? hmmm. its like being in an advertisement. haha. this brings a pretty weird image to my mind.. - i absolutely lurve 0621 :] cos we rockk. and we love squash too; right ACC hmmm? its kinda addictive. 0621 is a bunch of funlovin and carefree peeps; class outings always leave me wanting for more. theres the ACC [i bet the actcuteclub welcomes youu too], patrick, gary, xiaofu, daxiong, mashimaro and carrot, hamtaro blahblah lookalikes in here, so it gets pretty comical when you just look at them and for a spilt second they remind you of that one cartoon character thats ever so familiar.. hahaha. oh yes! todays birthday boy is yan hao! woohoo* happy birthday :] we celebrated it in a rather publicised manner: at toapayoh's koufu! haha. bought a lovely yummilicious choc cake and sang the song that touched him so; it was really fun. i want some more fun!
one more thing - nyjcians! vote for ANGIE THE CHOICE as part of NY Students Council! yay. its the sacred C32, so please support aiight! thankew :] publicity stunt one :P